You must have heard the saying "Making mountains out of molehills". That's exactly what magnifying is - when we exaggerate the importance or frequency of events that fit with our beliefs. Filtering, as a name suggests, is when we only accept an information that fits with our preconceptions and disregard any other equally legitimate information that contradicts our notion.
This kind of thinking is so common that it causes heated debates and fights when people don't want to let go their rigid way of thinking and refuse to open their minds to other opinions, facts and possibilities. We also often create distorted pictures of ourselves.
How often have you been in a situation when you pull out negative things out of context, isolated from all good experiences around you, and made them larger and more awful than they really were? In my opinion, it's a warning sign of a low self-esteem and feeling of worthlessness.
How to prevent yourself going down this road?
- Try to see the whole picture - take into account all facts, even if they don't seem to fit with your beliefs and expectations.
- See whether you can build a case for opposite of what you currently believe. For example, instead of thinking that you ruined the party by saying something silly, focus on your performance which you were praised for.
- Check that you're not blowing certain elements out of proportion. Did other people react the same way as you did?
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